Cake FAIL: Hey, YOU try paint a fairy ballerina princess in ICING.

Baby G is turning 4 on Monday and having a Fairy Princess High Tea tomorrow for 8 little like-minded friends. It should be an explosion of pink and I will take photos which will be adorable and delicious and cute. I will share on Monday and we will all ooh and aah and maybe shed a tear or two.

Tonight is another story.

Tonight, I made her birthday cake. I need to add here, that I make legendary cakes. It’s one of the parts of being a mother that I really do well. I bask in the warm glow of the compliments on my cake icing skills three times a year and might I say, I deserve the props. I can paint, just so you know. I have street cred in this department. I may even post previous cake pics as proof (if I can dig them up). So when, this year, Baby G requested a Fairy-Princess-Ballerina Cake, I didn’t bat an eyelash. Easy. I mean, how hard is it to paint a Fairy-Princess-Ballerina in icing?

Let me tell you. H.A.R.D.

Ladies and Gents, for your vicarious entrainment and laughter at my expense, I present to you the delightful cake I made for my four year old daughter:

She asked for a ballerina-princess-fairy cake. HEY, AT LEAST I TRIED. Introducing Satanic Ballerina on Crack. Can anyone say “Scary as hell”?

She had to go. Even I was beginning to have pre-emptive nightmares. *shudder*

A clean canvas. Dare I attempt the ballerina-fairy-princess again? Hmmmm…

If she asks…the fairy-princess-ballerina is hiding behind the rainbow.

Please, please, pretty please share your cake fails with me. Puh-leeease. I’ll make a gallery of them and we can all laugh and feel better about ourselves. 

 

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About Michelle Lewsen

Motherhood is a privilege but sometimes, when we're covered in vegemite/vomit/poo, it's hard to remember just how lucky we mums are. In another life I was an award-winning Copywriter with something to talk about other than the fact that Jason Mraz was on Sesame Street. I moonlighted as a Personal Trainer and Aerobics Instructor just for fun (because I was bored, what with all that annoying free time...) In this life, I'm mum to three entertaining yet exhausting, delightful yet demanding, inspiring yet soul-sucking people I've ever met. I love them intensely and will go Mama Bear on anyone who dares try hurt them. Even on the days they seem bent on my destruction. I am also the lucky winner of Cupid's lottery and somehow landed an incredible husband. The poor guy suffers through my adult ADHD with an admirable generosity of spirit and a wicked sense of humour. I think I'll keep him. This blog captures my life. Sometimes warm & fuzzy, sometimes shriek-out-loud funny. In my spare time (between 1am and 6am) I've been writing a series of children's books. Soon, I'll be publishing them and your kids are going to adore them, so watch this space. WARNING: I'm an oversharer. Working on it. (Not really)

Posted on J August, 2012, in Family, Life, Motherhood, Parenting, Toddler Fun and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 5 Comments.

  1. That was just hilarious! Thanks!
    Back when my kids were little ones, I was the worst cake baker on earth. Seriously. I can make bread, pizza, even pretzels. World class waffles and pancakes. Home made pasta. But cake? Hell, no. For my first child’s first birthday, I made a box mix cake, and left it on the table to cool. My cat walked right across it, leaving huge pot holes full of dirty cat fur. I cried and sobbed and pulled out a cookbook (It was a snowy day in January; going to the store for more cake mix was not an option). I made a lopsided, semi-burned, lumpy “vanilla” cake that my husband swore was delicious. (Everyone seemed to be too full for cake that night, though, funnily enough.) It never got much better, I have to admit!
    And Happy Birthday, Miss Gracie!!

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  2. OMG, that was fantastic hahahaha. I wish I could share a cake fail with you, it just never dawned on me to take a picture! One time I tried a Nemo cake, it became a grey submarine/Wayne the Shark thing but at least the house decorations were stunning *face palm*
    Well done and best wishes for Baby G :-)

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  3. When my kids were in primary school, I was the mum who always purchased sushi for ‘bring a plate of food to share’ activities. The very act of baking a cake is unusual and a ‘win’ for me. When it comes to cakes, I’m like the Olympic athlete who tap-dances with joy just making the finals. There would be no crying over a silver medal (or ugly icing), any colour medal (or icing) would have me cheering like a loon.

    Like you Mummymishy, my own mum was a birthday cake queen. The cake cottage with the iced flowering vine creeping around the front door for my 7th birthday was my favourite. When she was alive, she made exquisite creations for my children’s birthdays. Only twice did I attempt my own creative cakes. I actually can paint and draw, so I don’t know why I’m so averse to cake-making (can’t/won’t sew either – another talent of my mother’s).

    My first effort was a Thomas the Tank Engine (who looked related to your satanic fairy), and the second was a melancholy-looking brown bear. Both took HOURS, with much red-faced huffing and puffing and grim determination. Hubby and Mum laughed a bit at the funny results but I was really proud of them! And you know what? My kids and their friends thought they were great!

    My latest effort was for my son’s 18th. No huffing and puffing this time. I bought packets of mini jam rolls and swiss rolls, cut them into 5cm bits, built a pyramid, decorated it with marshmallows and M&Ms, and stuck in the candles at odd angles. It took 10 minutes, looked jolly, didn’t require a knife or plates, and the teenagers all thought it was really cool! (Actually, so did the adult gate-crashers who arrived with cartons balanced on shoulders. When I asked them to leave, they asked if they could just have a piece of cake…)

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  4. It wasn’t that bad! Less of the black gelly stuff and you would have been in the home stretch. I don’t have a picture of it, but one one big cake fail is the year I made a traditional chocolate cake for my uncle- I was probably about 12. I happened to be chewing minty gum and the time and oops it fell into the batter. Well, i searched and searched the batter (with my clean hands of coarse) but to no avail was the gum to be found. Didn’t have another box mix, so I baked the cake. We ate all the cake, My uncle got the very last corner piece- YEP, you guessed it……..the darn piece of gum. Needless to say, I am 36 and have yet to live that one down, even as my baking/cooking abilities have advanced and stunned him.

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