Category Archives: Bullying
This morning, the most beautiful picture found its way on to my Facebook newsfeed. It made me smile. It grounded me. It made me proud to be privileged enough to be called “Mum”. Here it is:
I was all loved up and happy until I read the horrific caption that went with it:
“This picture and a whole swath of others like it have been removed by Facebook and other social media sites for being vulgar.”
My blood is boiling over this. It is so very wrong on multiple levels.
This picture is not pornography.
Know what is pornographic? The countless images that Facebook thrusts on to my newsfeed as ‘suggested’ stories – images of emaciated teenage bodies accompanied by information about the diet pills I should be taking/milkshakes I should be drinking to look like them. These images are vulgar in their message that, somehow, I – a 38 year old mother of three – should aim to look like them. Know what else is vulgar? Read the rest of this entry →
Tags: annorexic, baby belly, droopy boobs, facebook newsfeed, hero of the day, insult to injury, lose weight after baby, media pressure, perfect body, perfect woman, post-baby body, sad images, saggy belly, self-esteem, stretch marks
If you were an alien visiting the Earth and found yourself in a Western country this past week, you’d have learnt the following things about the People Of Earth:
ONE: Miley Cyrus is Very Important and has magic powers. With a few shakes of her rear (accompanied by an unnaturally long extension of her tongue), this young earthling can make poverty, murder and impending war d i s a p p e a r. Yep – anyone who witnessed Twerkgate was privy to the instantaneous vanishing of the murdered Syrian children, threats of WWIII and… well… anything of actual importance from world news. Poof!
TWO: Twerking is horrible and slutty. HOWEVER, women should be allowed to twerk to their hearts’ content because we own our bodies, so quit judging and back-off. ALTHOUGH, even though we shouldn’t Judge Miley (poor, poor, poor Miley, naive and expressing her rights) she really did behave like the sluttiest slutty slut from Sluttsville and Read the rest of this entry →
I couldn’t believe I was finally here. After a whirlwind six weeks of pre-cooking meals, re-organising of karate/dancing/footy schedules and some serious yanking up of my big girl knickers, I was finally standing at the Qantas check-in counter at the airport. Brand-new red conference handbag slung (so fashionably, people were fainting left and right) over my shoulder and my I’m-still-young-and-hip-dude pink camo backpack at my feet, I lugged my Daddy Bear sized suitcase on to the scale.
“Is this luggage yours?”
I looked up and beamed. “All mine.” I declared. The Qantas lady raised an eyebrow quizzically, “Did you pack it all yourself?” The beam grew, “Yep, every square inch of it!” She looked at me funny (What? Never seen a Mum experiencing the unparalleled joy of a whole suitcase all to herself before?) “Ohhh-kay…” Read the rest of this entry →
My friend, Keesha Beckford of Mom’s New Stage posted this piece today after the Trayvon Martin verdict. Please go read it (I’ll wait) because her message needs to be heard and her anguish shouldn’t go unchecked.
As a peaches and cream mother to three lily-white kids, I can’t fathom a world that might cross to the other side when facing my (one day grown up) son. I can’t possibly begin to imagine having to one day explain to him the likelihood of this scenario in his future. It fills me with immense sadness that any mother should have to look at her innocent, sleeping boy and wonder, as Keesha wonders:
“…as the mother of an almost five-year old brown boy, what I am to think? What am I to tell my son? Don’t give me the bullshit that all parents of all colors have to advise their children how to stay safe. It is different for black and brown men, and if you don’t acknowledge that you are either stupid, crazy or in complete denial of the unfathomable depths of American racism. So someone please tell me, what should I tell my baby when he’s old enough to navigate the world alone?”
I can’t offer an analysis of the trial, of who was wrong or right. I can’t speak about George Zimmerman or Trayvon Martin.
All I can offer is this: A letter to Keesha’s little boy. A letter to my Jewish son. A letter to the obese kid. A letter to that weird kid who makes funny noises…. Read the rest of this entry →
“Daniel called me an S-WORD HEAD!”
(She actually said “S-word” head because she could NOT bring herself to say, ‘shit’.)
Miss M was six years old. She came running to me after school, upset because someone had used *gasp* the S-word. She was horrified and devastated that a child could use THAT word.
It was then that a light bulb switched on and I had an A-HA moment. Read the rest of this entry →
Tags: bullying, Daniel, empowerment, facebook, Fuck, Idiot, inner power, kids can be mean, Mother, name-calling, pants falling down, poo-head, Profanity, resilience, school, Shit, shit-head, Shithead (card game), swear words, word power, words
Do unto others as you’d have them do unto you.
I have tried to raise my kids with good manners, compassion, respect for other people’s property, the ability to share and a sense of kindness for everyone around them.
I thought I was doing the right thing.
I wasn’t wrong.
If we lived in a perfect world, that is.
Problem: This isn’t a perfect world.
It is a world where other kids are not necessarily taught to say please and thank you, not to swear, to share, to be kind, to not hit. It’s a world where other kids will snatch, steal and be downright cruel.
By teaching my kids to always be nice, have I indirectly rendered them incapable of coping in a less than perfect world? I didn’t think so for a long time. I wasn’t that cynical. I was a firm believer in raising my kids to always be kind, polite and certainly, to never hit.
Until Little Man got punched in the guts. In pre-school.
Let me explain. Read the rest of this entry →
Today’s post is prompted by a writing challenge. It spoke to me. I’d love to hear about your thoughts on this challenge.
You have the choice to erase one incident from your past, as though it never happened. What would you erase and why?
It was 1986, a temperate Summer’s day in Johannesburg, and it was almost time for the school bell to ring for break. I was crazy-obsessed with playing elastics with the girls in my class and looked forward to the chanting, jumping, giggling joy only a ten year old knows.
That bell rang, it’s Pavlov’s Dog effect causing excessive shrieking and laughter, and we were dismissed. I ran with a gaggle of little girls to sit under a tree and eat our lunches as quickly as possible (I was not one to ever skip a meal – even for elastics). As we ate, we talked about the important things in life, like whose mother packed them a chocolate (not mine) and who was wearing what colour knickers (don’t do handstands in a dress).
Then it started.
She was sitting by herself, eating her egg-mayonnaise sandwich. She looked sad. Read the rest of this entry →
What’s the MOMfessional? It’s a place where Parenting Bloggers can come to write about something that they usually keep hidden. It’s a place where we let our skeletons out of the closet and let ‘em dance! Welcome to the MOMfessional – a space where other parenting bloggers can let it all hang out. Read the rest of this entry →
When I was a little girl, my mother would read stories to me about nasty, evil little trolls hiding under bridges, with the sole purpose of disrupting the day of innocent passers-by and causing undue stress and misery. When I grew up, however, unlike other mythical creatures, trolls didn’t disappear into the category of imaginary things.
I am here to tell you this: trolls are very real.
I met one a few weeks ago, in fact. Let’s call him Jon. (To protect his identity and such. I’m kind that way.) Read the rest of this entry →
Tags: adult bully, bulllying, epic proportions, etiquette, hiding behind a keyboard, I met a troll, internet troll, little trolls, mamapedia troll, man trolling mommy bloggers, mental giant, small man syndrome, social media, tantrum, temper tantrum, tips for dealing with trolls, troll, why do people troll
I’ve been observing the run for the American presidency with abject fascination.
It’s been quite a show, I must say – even from the opposite end of the world over here. Listening to the talking heads, watching the debates, seeing the sheer spectacle of it all has left me scratching my head and wondering about the way Mr Romney and President Obama (and the three-dimensional media circus that follows them) have been conducting themselves.
You see, if any of our children behaved the way they have been behaving, they would find themselves in the naughty corner contemplating their Ps and Qs for a very long time.
We teach our children from the time they are little to share, play nice, work together, be respectful. We teach them please and thank-you. We tell them to respect diversity of opinion. And then we put two leaders in front of them who promptly throw these rules out of the window.
So, Mr Romney & President Obama, here’s a reminder of what you were taught in preschool:
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Tags: american presidency, Barack Obama, elections, facebook, Fox News, Fox News vs MSNBC, kindergarten rules, media circus, Mitt Romney, naughty spot, politics, pre-school rules, President Obama, Presidential Candidate, Presidential Race, ps and qs, shameful behavior, sheer spectacle, sitting in the corner, Ten things the presidential candidates could learn from my child's pre-school teacher